Friday, October 13, 2017

Friday's Five: First Month Goals

Really my only goal for the baby's first month is: to survive... and enjoy!

I have no goals as far as the baby other than for us to just enjoy this time, adjust to our new life, get sleep while we can, and have lots of cuddles with our little guy!  We're going into things with an open mind and not many expectations or plans - the only plan is to do what's best for us.  These are just a few ways for us to keep life somewhat normal for ourselves.  

Are all of my goals realistic?  Who knows - personally, for us, I do think they are.  
Am I expecting them all to be achieved (and especially during that first week)?  No.  
But, if I write something down, I'm much more likely to hold myself accountable to try so... 

1. Date nights - and by date night, I mean sitting down to dinner together - takeout on the deck, a freezer meal in the dining room, venturing out to one of our favorite spots with the baby for dinner/lunch.   I know we'll definitely make it out for at least one (if not more) because Derek's birthday is coming up so leaving the little guy with my parents briefly is already on our minds.

2. Stella - I want to make sure to make sure she feels loved and included.  I am self admittedly SO obsessed with her.  Knowing her personality, I know she will love the baby once she realizes he's one of her family - she already lays on the rug in his room and we joke that she'll want to sleep in there with them.  

Whether she gets a five minute walk instead of a half hour walk or rides in the car for an errand instead of a full day wondering at the office I want to make an effort to keep her routine somewhat normal and spend some time cuddling just her.  We've been bad about making an effort to get her to daycare recently so I think with the baby at first letting her go once a week to have fun playing will be great!

If I had to hear one more time "just wait Stella, you'll be forgotten about"... No, Stella will not be forgotten about - she's a full family member as we are proudly crazy dog people. 

3. Quiet Time - Not only me with maternity leave, but Derek also is able to have a lot of time off as well and I'm so thankful for our flexible schedules - I think having both of us around more will help us transition into this new life much better.  Running an errand alone, having a little bit of time to sit on the couch and scroll on Pinterest, Sunday football (all  of us will be together for Saturday football and Penn State viewing, of course!), a half hour nap, a quick pedicure - Once a week or so I think it's healthy to make sure each of us does something little just for us - separate from the other - to just relax and breathe.

4. Getting Out - I know myself and if I get into the habit of just sitting at home right away, I'll probably be stuck in that slump all winter long! Getting out or getting others in too - simple things like going to my parents for dinner, having a neighbor over to the house for a drink, going out for an easy lunch or dinner, a short walk, venturing to Target the three of us (because if I'm being honest, I'm definitely too scared to try that on my own, ha)!

While schedules are flexible, it won't be a full maternity leave and we'll still have to get into the office periodically but even just getting out to go there will do some good.

5. Don't Worry About Pressures: I don't feel the need to do something a certain way just because someone else did.  I feel the need to do whatever makes Derek, the baby and I happiest and healthiest.  I never realized how many opinions people had... on everything, ha! Any comments and such I'm hoping I can just ignore and not let get to me.  

How to feed the baby, where a baby should sleep, loosing baby weight, keeping our house a certain way, going out with the baby - every person's views are different! 

Oh my, I hit a point during my pregnancy where I'd been asked about breastfeeding so much - I was happy to see and hear when people spoke up about formula feeding.  I don't feel the need to breastfeed, pump, formula feed just because that's what everyone says to do - If something works, it works, if it doesn't it doesn't. Whatever is healthiest and best for us is what we'll do - I won't let it make us all miserable.  When we got Stella she refused to eat for three weeks so for four meals a day - she was hand fed, I think we'll make it!

Happy & healthy mom, baby and dad are key in my mind.

Any mamas have tips for surviving the first week/month?!  Please share!


  1. I have no doubt that y'all are going to have a rockstar first month & be amazing parents! All your goals sound really attainable and you are right to focus on doing what works for you!

  2. You and your husband are going to do exactly what feels right for the family of 4 :) I think you are going to rock it girl! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

  3. You had some great goals and I really think you will accomplish them all and do whatever is best for you and your family! You guys are going to be wonderful parents and Stella will be the best big sister!

  4. You have a great outlook on things! It's so easy to get sucked into doing things because others did it that way, I know I did with my first. Ugh, it was exhausting!! I am so excited for you and Derek and Stella!

  5. Great point about breastfeeding and formula feeding! It is so hard once that baby gets here with all those emotions and hormones and exhaustion kicking in...just know you're a great mom HOWEVER you decide to feed that baby boy. Fed is best!!!!

  6. oh girly! these dont seem unrealistic at all. but then again i'm not a momma :) but still. you're gonna do so so great and just enjoy all the time - and as you said - survive hehe. so close!

    xoxo cheshire kat

  7. I love that y'all still want to get out and have a date night even if it's just sitting down to dinner together at the house. That's one thing that Chris and I really want to do as well. I also love that you want to give Stella all the attention that she needs to. People used to say that to us about Dart, and it would make me so mad because he's our first baby, we wouldn't just forget about him!

  8. Great goals, I think you and your husband will be amazing parents. You need to do what you feel is best for your family. I'm sure Stella will be a great big sister.

  9. Great list! You guys are both super fortunate that you have such flexible schedules, and family support so close by. Date nights are super important, and making sure your marriage still gets the attention it deserves and of course Miss Stella! Stroller walks with doggy in tow will be great for everyone to get some fresh air and exercise. And I hear ya on the feeding, I breast fed/pumped for the first 6 months, and I was more than ready to wean off. I'm amazed how women can keep that routine up for a year, and have always assumed that they must be stay at home moms because lugging the pump and all the supplies back and forth to work every day was no joke. You do what's best for you, your body, and your baby <3
    Green Fashionista

  10. Good for you, girl! I love your attitude toward all this - do what’s right for you and your family. That’s all that matters! And, I’m so happy to hear you say those things about Stella. It drives me NUTS when people tell me Finn will take a backseat once we have a baby. Um, I don’t think so since I consider him my first born - ha!

  11. Great attitude! Do what is best for y'all and so not let other people tell you what to do or judge you. You are going to rock being parents and I know you are ready to meet little man!

  12. I have a two month old, and I was so afraid about our beloved dog not getting enough attention. It's just the nature of the game that he doesn't get as much as before, but we have been proactive about including him, and he gets our undivided attention once our human baby goes to bed for the night. It's great to hear about other dog owners like you that prioritize your dog. I, too, got so sick of people telling me that I would hate my dog or not care about him after baby.

  13. Sounds like you guys have the right mindset! My advice to anyone is always, do whatever you want, whatever you feel is right! No one will know your baby more than you and your husband. We are first time parents and our baby is now 6 months old. Going out with baby wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. We started going out to restaurants with him right away and I think it helped us and him get used to it. We also had our first date night when our baby was 2 weeks old (we went out to dinner and I think we were gone for like an hour lol), but it helped us feel “normal.” Good luck mama, you will do great!

  14. You are absolutely right... you have to do what works for YOU and your family!! The first month is all about surviving, and you do whatever it takes. You will rock mommyhood! Xoxo

  15. This post is everything. Love that you are embracing YOU and YOUR life... because that's all that matters. Happy, healthy, family. Much love to you all in this new stage!